Hold the Phone!

Delay. It is not a word most people want to hear. In a society where almost everything is instant, the concept of waiting is generally frowned upon. Exercising patience, especially when everyone else is plowing forward and already enjoying that long-awaited thing, can seem like torture.

But waiting is exactly what one organization is encouraging parents to do. Wait Until 8th is on a mission to empower parents to rally together by way of a pledge and delay smartphone usage for their children until at least the eighth grade.

How it started

Founded by Brooke Shannon in 2017, Wait Until 8th began when Shannon, along with a handful of other parents in her Austin, Texas, community, began discussing their concern over the multitude of obvious problems associated with allowing young children to have smartphones too early.

In an interview with the American Enterprise Institute (AEI), Shannon, a mother of three daughters, explained the campaign started in her own household when her oldest daughter was in the third grade, and many of her peers began getting iPhones. This led to her daughter questioning every few days when she, too, could have a phone.

“It just felt so young and not right,” Shannon recalled. “I always saw kids completely sucked into this vortex of an online world and not really living life as a kid, and I just wanted life to look a little different for my kiddo.”

Shannon described driving past her daughter’s future middle school and being discouraged by what she saw at the end of the school day.

“I saw all these kids flooding out, all of them with their heads down, nobody with their heads up,” Shannon said. “As a mom, it was sad to think this was the road ahead for my daughters, and I just wanted it to look differently.”

That night, Shannon emailed 20 or so other moms to gauge their thoughts about smartphones – if they had already given their children smartphones, and if not, when they planned to do so.

“Out of that conversation,” Shannon explained, “came this idea of ‘What if we hold off together until a certain point?’”

Thus, Wait Until 8th was birthed.

How it works

The Wait Until 8th pledge is a national initiative, but is organized locally. Parents are encouraged to band together and sign up each of their children who are in elementary or middle school.

Wait Until 8th understands the feeling of isolation and the negative pressures of being the only child in his or her grade without a phone. That’s why the pledge only becomes active when at least 10 families in the same grade and school have signed the pledge.

The pledge is simple. Parents fill out a basic form with relevant information about their child’s school, and by signing, they pledge, “I agree not to give my child a smartphone until at least eighth grade as long as at least 10 families total from my child’s grade and school pledge to do the same.”

Once 10 families have come on board, Wait Until 8th will notify the parents that the pledge is activated. Since there is strength in numbers, Wait Until 8th will then connect through email the families who have signed the pledge, so the parents can support one another.

Why wait?

Wait Until 8th details numerous convincing reasons smartphone technology should be delayed. To bolster its assertion, the organization provides links to research and studies conducted by various institutions, such as universities, the National Institutes of Health, the American Academy of Pediatrics, and others.

Wait Until 8th claims research indicates that smartphones impair sleep, alter children’s brains, provoke eating disorders, increase the likelihood of suicide, and much more. (Details can be found at waituntil8th.org/why-wait.)

The top five reasons they list for delaying smartphones for children are:

▶ Smartphones are changing childhood.

▶ They are distracting and addictive.

▶ Smartphones expose children to … sexual content.

▶ They increase [the] risk for anxiety and depression.

▶ Smartphones put children at risk for cyberbullying.

It may seem counterintuitive to delay digital technology for children in such a digitally and technologically advanced society.

But on its website, Wait Until 8th cited an eye-opening article from the New York Times highlighting that many top Silicon Valley executives in the technology world are doing just that.

The organization asked: “If leaders of digital giants like Google, eBay, Apple, and Yahoo are delaying the smartphone, then should this not give us pause? Executives that flourish on the success of technology are protecting their children from the smartphone. Should we not do the same?”

If waiting is not an option

Many parents share Shannon’s concerns and reservations about giving their children smartphones too early. However, the benefits of being able to easily and quickly get in touch with their children and keep track of their location via GPS seem to outweigh the dangers.

In addition, in this broken world, children can find themselves in situations when having a phone makes more sense than not. Children from broken homes may need a reliable way to contact their primary caretaker. Children from single-parent homes are sometimes home alone after school until the parent can make it home from work and may need a means to reach out to someone for help.

The good news is, there are many alternatives to smartphones that provide these benefits without the associated risks.

“The majority of problems associated with smartphones are because of the access to an internet browser and to the app store,” Wait Until 8th said.

For that reason, Wait Until 8th provides a list of recommended basic communications devices, such as flip phones, smartwatches, and phones without games, internet connectivity, or social media capabilities.

“Childhood is too short to waste on a smartphone,” Wait Until 8th said. “Let kids be kids a little longer.”

Expert wisdom

The Stand reached out to AFA friend and a familiar voice to AFR listeners, Dr. Kathy Koch, for her opinion of the Wait Until 8th pledge.

Koch is the founder and president of Celebrate Kids, an organization that “exists to equip and encourage parents to raise godly children who understand their purpose.”

Koch is familiar with Wait Until 8th, but she said, “I don’t know anything about the people at the organization or any ways they go about their business. However, do I think the idea of delaying a smartphone is wise? Absolutely!”

But Koch said she believes “character age counts more than chronological age.”

“I would not say to a sixth-grader, ‘When you are in the eighth grade, you’ll get your own phone,’” Koch said. “If on the first day of eighth grade your child is still a whiny, complaining, irresponsible, quickly angry, all-about-me kid, I would still delay the phone because their character is already less than great, and adding a smartphone will only make it worse.”

Koch encourages parents to be cautious, regardless of their child’s age. “Delay is a great concept, but I don’t want parents to think they shouldn’t still be discerning and not teach self-censorship.”

To be fair, Wait Until 8th does not suggest that parents automatically give their children smartphones simply because they reach the eighth grade.

Shannon explained in the interview with AEI how they arrived at eighth grade as being an appropriate time for parents to make the decision whether they would, or would not, give their children phones at that time.

As Wait Until 8th researched the issue, it found, across the board, that child psychologists, safety experts, and even technology executives themselves, agreed the suggested age before introducing smartphones was between 14 and 16 years old.

Shannon did not think waiting until 16 would gain enough community support, therefore, the age 14, or eighth grade, was chosen.

“The age of 14 seemed within reach,” Shannon said. “What’s key to remember is that just because you’re signing the pledge to hold off until eighth grade, you’re not promising to give your child a smartphone then. You’re promising to hold off on the decision until the eighth grade.”

Koch’s concerns

Koch shares the same concerns as many parents regarding smartphone access.

“Certainly, there are concerns about inappropriate games, inappropriate people they follow on social media, and access to inappropriate content such as pornography,” she said.

However, Koch has an even greater fear.

“My biggest concern is how the smartphone changes the character development of our children,” Koch explained. “Technology causes us to be self-centered, entitled, and selfish.

“Children [younger than] eighth grade, and even middle-school and high-school students are still developing. Eye contact, facial feedback, reading body language, being others-centered, and caring about other people’s conversations can be hindered.”

Koch believes another danger inherent to smartphone technology is the illusion that one can be happy all the time.

“We have a device, the games we want, the people we want, the platforms we want, and everything is new and about us and easy and entertaining,” she said. “So we think the world should work like that. But that’s not how the world works.”

Despite the obvious dangers, Koch does not place the blame on phones alone.

“The phone itself is not evil. They can be great. They can expand ministry. They can even expand evangelism with discipleship,” Koch said. “It’s the person who’s using it that matters most. It’s about how much we use it. It’s about what we have on it. It’s about what we think of people and whether we are putting people first in our lives.”

Koch is under no illusion that withholding smartphones from children until they are ready will be a task for the faint of heart.

“Parents need to be bold enough to say ‘no.’ It’s not an easy situation, but parents have a right to have the boundaries they feel are best for their kids,” Koch said. “And I would absolutely commend any parent who strongly fights against culture and says, ‘Not yet. It’s not wise for you, not yet.’” 

Editor’s note: Wait Until 8th does not claim to be a Christian organization. As such, this article is not meant to imply an endorsement. However, it is intended to highlight the dangers of smartphone technology making its way into the hands of children too early and to encourage parents to wait until a more appropriate age to give their children smartphones. The Stand believes such efforts are commendable.