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Unpacking Baggage in Marriage

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Marriage is a sacred union, yet many couples enter this bond carrying emotional baggage from their past experiences. This baggage can stem from various sources, including unhealed relationships, disappointments, and even dysfunctional family dynamics. In this episode of By Design, Bert Harper emphasizes that it’s not about whether you come from a dysfunctional family, but rather the degree of dysfunction that can impact your relationship.

One of the key points discussed is the importance of facing our past honestly. Ignoring or glossing over painful experiences can hinder our ability to connect with our spouse. Instead, we are encouraged to confront these issues with humility, acknowledging that they shape who we are today. This process involves tracing the roots of our emotional baggage—understanding where our fears and reactions come from.

The episode also highlights the transformative power of God's grace. We are reminded that no matter how heavy our baggage may feel, God offers us the strength to overcome it. Through faith, couples can find healing and restoration, allowing their marriage to flourish.

To aid in this journey, our host introduces the concept of "face it, trace it, and grace it." This three-step approach encourages individuals to confront their past, understand its impact, and then embrace the grace that God provides to move forward. The discussion is filled with practical insights and biblical wisdom that can help couples navigate their challenges together.

As we conclude the episode, we are reminded that God desires for us to have healthy, thriving relationships. By facing our baggage and seeking healing, we can create a loving environment where both partners can grow and support one another.

If you're looking for guidance on how to strengthen your marriage and overcome past hurts, this episode is a must-listen. Tune in and discover how to embrace God's design for your relationship, allowing grace to lead the way to healing and restoration.

January/February Issue
2026
Life: A gospel issue
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